SAY YES (OR NO)

The Real Scoop on Love and Marriage Today

By Anais / 22 March 2024

say yes Marriage is more than just a union between two souls. Photo source: Freepik 

  • Dreaming of happily ever after and dealing with the ups and downs of everyday relationships, marriage takes us on a journey beyond fairy tales.

Marriage has been a part of human history forever. It’s often seen as the union of two souls, like Adam and Eve or the quest for a soulmate – the perfect match, the yin to your yang. 

Do you remember playing with Barbie dolls as kids, imagining them walking down the aisle with our favourite action figures? That’s how we used to view marriage—simple and full of happily-ever-after dreams.

However, in today’s world, marriage is a bit more “exciting”. Let’s just take a moment and think about it.

To say yes or no?

 

The Fairy Tale Fantasy

say yes Pokok.AsiaLife doesn’t unfold like a fairytale, much like Blanche Neige. Photo source: Radiostarsud.fr

The question keeps cropping up in my head, especially after catching the latest Batman film at the cinema. Isn’t it peculiar? Why didn’t Batman and Catwoman just tie the knot, especially when they seemed head over heels for each other? I was there, eagerly waiting for that happily-ever-after moment we’re so used to in movies. But nope, despite their obvious love, they chose to go their separate ways.

This got me thinking. So, I turned to my friend Camille, who’s happily engaged, and asked her about marriage. She said it’s like a safe haven, a place of peace and balance where she can feel at home. Nice thoughts, but let’s be real here; perhaps marriage isn’t the fairy tale we imagine. Maybe Catwoman understood that she might feel stuck or dependent in such a committed relationship.

Camille disagreed with me, seeing marriage more positively as a bond built on love, communication, respect, and compromise rather than emotional dependence. I struggled to see things her way. Perhaps because I haven’t experienced love like hers, but I felt she was too optimistic. Still, I respect her opinion; she’s speaking from her own experiences and understanding of marriage.

What bothers me is how both women and men sometimes overlook the harsh realities right in front of us. We’ve been taught for ages that marriage equals relationship success and love is all we need. Blame it on Hollywood or Disney, with their stories of princes rescuing princesses.

But facing the reality of marriage can be a shock. Routine, responsibilities, and expectations often lead to disappointments—while some may find this fulfilling, it’s not for everyone, certainly not for me.

 

The Masks Falls 

say yes Pokok.AsiaGetting married and enjoying the perks is the modern side of marriage. Photo source: Socialitelife.com

My doubts about marriage and relationships come from the idea that nowadays, it’s often about choosing a partner based on wealth and looks.

Not everyone views marriage purely for love. Take Serena Van der Woodsen from Gossip Girl, for instance; she dated Dan Humphrey despite having New York’s elite at her beck and call. Now, that’s love.

However, calculated relationships have become more common these days. Not everyone is a hopeless romantic, and that’s perfectly fine. In fact, since marriage isn’t just about two individuals joining together as we once thought; it’s about merging two families into one, so naturally, compromises are bound to happen. Nowadays, people are choosing their partners more carefully.

What makes it even more challenging is that we’re less honest about it now. And don’t even get me started on the pressure young girls face about getting married. I mean, seriously? It’s like they’re scared of being left behind if they’re not hitched by 30, pushing them to rush into every relationship. That’s messed up.

In today’s world, marriage feels like fiction to me. Sure, there are genuine couples out there, but as said, the majority of our generation simply wants someone who checks all the boxes.

Plus, with my travels, I’ve seen how different cultures approach relationships. In various places, young adults hop from one partner to another like it’s no big deal. How are we supposed to find something serious in such an environment?

And the dating scene? I could go on and on about this. It’s all about swiping right and sliding into DMs. Whatever happened to meeting someone organically, like Cinderella did?

 

Writing My Own Love Story

 

But you know what? I’m done with conforming to societal norms. I’d rather live like Eloise in Bridgerton: independent, free, and the star of my own story. 

Well, I didn’t exactly come out and say, “Hey, I don’t want to be loved!” I mean, who does, right? Even the Joker was looking for that. But here’s the thing: I’m not about to let societal pressure dictate my love life. I’ll find love on my terms, not based on someone’s bank account.

So, here’s to packing my bags and living life according to my desires. I might not fit into society’s dating game, but you know what? When it comes to love, I’m in it for the real deal.

 

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