Tiny paws and Big Personality
- Love at first sight? I don’t think so- the feeling was more distasteful. I hated her!
Back in June, a chapter unfolded–a chapter I wished I could rewrite, erasing any notion of an event that introduced what some call the “warmth and love” cats supposedly bring to a home.
Like the many fathers that walk away from their kids- that was I.
Her presence, cries, and constant need for attention felt suffocating. There is no possible measurement that could measure my distrust and understanding of the feline species.
Why did I adopt her? Well I wouldn’t call it an adoption and I certainly wouldn’t say it was by choice. A close friend had to give her kittens away because she was leaving and no other person was looking for a cat.
Aura fell in my care. Ridiculous If you ask me! So everyone, this is my story and journey with my little feline, Aura.
Failed Reciprocation
Moments of Her Playing Alone
Do you have a younger sibling who just wants to go everywhere you go or stick so close to you– only to bring a feeling of annoyance and anger? She was that and more to me.
No amount of shutting her out did the trick!
She probably thought I had more games up my sleeve-which only got her gravitating towards me. I tried to “shoo” her but she still found a way to come back.
Meowing pitifully and brushing against my leg- I couldn’t, I just couldn’t be what she wanted.
Lying in bed, Netflix on screen, and she stood at my door, slowly walked in, and jumped on my bed, wondering what the noise was, only for her to get on my chest and find comfort, but I quickly brushed her off.
Or when I walked past her, and she would hit my leg with her paw. Multiple times.
The tender love and care were nonexistent. The heart, mind, and soul could not reciprocate.
Striking Turbulence
Family Over Anything: Love is too long
You may ask yourself why I felt the way I did- now that you are here, here it is.
My mother found out she had a brain tumour and had to get surgery- a very painful period for my family and myself.
My mind spun 100 m/h, thoughts after thoughts; discourse and more self-conversation. I never wanted to think again. I began to close up, I used my head, and my heart was just an empty void.
The place where I lay began to feel cold, but I was conditioned to be okay because all I could think about was how my sister had to handle everything by herself. Hearing her cry, I knew I had to be okay for the both of us.
Separated by STUPID distance!
And WORSE–being nagged by a cat that wanted my attention and love which I could have given to my mother. I guess she just sensed my pain and distress.
For my mother is everything- I felt useless. Counting the days to surgery, I was drowning in my own pit of thoughts.
Turning Pages
She couldn’t wait to get away from the camera
Operation day- an immense amount of faith fell at my doorstep, and prayer was all I had known.
My cat followed me around the whole day- I found myself seated on the couch, where she came and laid on me, brushing my hand with her cheek.
I gave in- WHAT CAME OVER ME!
I held her in my arms- and began to pet her, and when I saw her little face and piercing ombre eyes, the hate I had oozed right out of my system.
That moment I knew- there was a reason why she entered my life.
She got me through the day. I felt comfort, love and that warm feeling in my chest. I began to feel relaxed. We stayed laid up as I patiently waited on updates but something in me knew that all would be alright.
I found myself reminiscing on past moments where she would brush against my leg, or hit me to tell me she wanted to play- she was always with me all this time
I needed to open up!
Heartbeat of Home
A connection so deep the oceans would be jealous
Like the saying “The universe works in mysterious ways,” she was the way out of my slump.
Reminded me of that is good and hopeful- a love I could never buy. Cheered me up and brought a hundredfold of faith and peace. My days began to brighten up.
This felt like family- she is my family! That’s how I knew that she was my forever home away from home. My heartbeat of home.
Today I believe in the quote “Home is where the heart is.” In this case, home is where the heart purrs, and mine pumps custard to the melody of my 6-month-old cat, Aura.
Healing Whiskers
You may wonder why her name is Aura- it speaks for itself. She came at a time when my life was upside down, a time that did not seem to end.
She lifted me from darkness and brought nothing but good at a time I needed and with her, I know clarity is clear to see and that she excels at support! So–Right after surgery, all focus was on recovery.
The family began to calm down, we were filled with thanks and appreciation for those who stood with us.
Physiotherapy was hard, but each day she grew hopeful and stronger.
Today my mother is healthier than ever. The tumour wasn’t cancerous, THANK GOD!
Aura- you are your name and gracefully living your truth!
Thank you for being my forever home!
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https://pokok.asia/my-cat-my-home-a-story-of-love-and-loss/
